I have a lot to do in the next year of my life, and a lot of changes will be occurring. I'll be turning thirty. I have to find a new place to live. And I'll most likely be living alone, for the first time ever. It's time to buy a vehicle. I'd like to get back to REALLY working out, not the half-ass stuff I've been doing of late. And, sure, getting a new boyfriend wouldn't hurt.

Change has always excited me. I've never been one of those people who handled routine and stagnation particularly well. Sure, I like stability, especially in those around me. But it's not a trait that would be very applicable to me. I am changeable. I like to change my hair color and cut frequently- always have. I change the picture and color scheme on my cell phone regularly. I routinely change my beauty products. I have a hard time sticking with any one thing, product or romantic interest for very long.

My twenties have been a seemingly endless and winding road. Did they turn out as I thought they would? No. I didn't become a wife and/or a mother. I didn't get a college degree. I didn't see Gore become President, or Kerry...much to my annoyance. I didn't meet the love of my life (well, I have six months to go till my twenties are over, but the odds are still against that). I didn't get rich, or anywhere close. I didn't become an actress or a professional singer. I've held several jobs- some good, some not, none paying nearly what I want to make. I learned what cubicle life is all about (the movie Office Space got it right, trust me). My health took a serious detour, and not for the better. I did lose weight, but of course not as much as I would have liked.

But, overall, would I change all of it? I'm still not sure. Because life is about learning, and having nothing but happiness and good times isn't much a teacher. I met some truly awesome people this decade, people who set my limited little idea of what the world on it's ear. I've listened to music that's inspired me. I've watched movies and television shows that made me soar inside, made me laugh till my stomach hurt, made me cry, made me want to throw things at the TV. I've learned how to type, how to expertly talk about medical insurance, how banks really work. I got my first checking account, then my first savings account. I got my first cell phone. I got my first computer, learning how to cope with all it's accompanying wonders and headaches. I've had a couple of surgeries that left me in so much pain I hoped for death. All of this, I did on my own. I watched a couple of loves walk out of my life, never to return. I've had depression, elation, anxiety, excitement. I've had it all, internally, at least. When I look back like this, it's easy to see that I accomplished a lot more in the decade than I often give myself credit for.

It's been a decade of a lot of first times. From all I can see, my thirties will include just as many firsts. And I suppose, in my limited understanding, that's what life is. Jumping in, despite the fear, and doing things for the first time, until you get good at them. Change IS life. At least, it's mine.